Welcome to the Capsule Chill-Out Club – the place where we chat to well-known Kiwi gals about how they cope with high stress, high cortisol and anxiety… and how the chill the f*** out when everything is getting just a little too much! Brought to you by our pals at Shark Beauty to celebrate the launch of the much-anticipated CryoGlow Cooling + LED Face Mask – a wearable combo of LED light therapy and under-eye cooling that delivers clinically tested skin-firming and acne-reducing results – we’ll be delving deep into what we’re all doing to stay balanced, level and, well, chill! In this edition, our favourite sexologist and all-around good b*tch (literally – see here!) Morgan Penn, who has some *nifty* techniques to de-stress – and no, they’re not all what you’re thinking!
Capsule x Shark Beauty
Kia ora, Morgan! You’re a somatic sexologist – meaning you’re known for being super-connected to your body and what it needs. What instantly drops your shoulders and relaxes you?
For me, it’s always putting my feet in the ocean and feeling the sand squidge between my toes!
Can you tell us what your relationship with anxiety like right now because, we know, she’s a b*tch!
Hmm, how interesting and timely for me to reflect on right now! I’ve never been an anxious person, but I recently got a new puppy and my relaxed, ‘go with the flow’ way of life has come to a grinding halt! I’m anxious that he’s going to get attacked by another dog when we walk, I lie awake in bed at night and wonder if I’m being a good enough puppy mum to him, or if I should be doing more. It’s crazy!
Overwhelm is completely normal (God, especially in this day and age!) – so when was the last time that you felt completely overwhelmed, and what did you do about it?
It was just a few weeks ago, actually. I was going to Blenheim to speak at a perimenopause event and I was nervous about doing a good job and I was nervous about leaving my puppy. I was trying to get through my clients and workload before I left. I left things right down to the wire – and then the puppy piddled inside. I just burst into tears and let my body go into full collapse mode. I am high functioning in a stressful time (thank you childhood trauma) but the downside to that is I often miss the cues when I REALLY am at capacity. When I reach that point I shut down, I retract from those who love me the most and I hide in my cave. I’ve learned now how to ask for help and support. I used to think I couldn’t have needs without being “needy”.
So how are you generally with coping with overstimulation and high cortisol?
My work focuses on nervous systems, and I spend my days regulating my client’s nervous systems, so actually, as you say, my livelihood depends on me keeping my cortisol low! I prioritise down regulation and embodiment practices every day. It works most of the time……
What’s your emergency anti-anxiety hack?
Three pumps of the Artemis de-stress spray under my tongue. A breath of four counts in through the nose and an exhale of six out the mouth on repeat. I find something to be grateful for – research shows that fear and gratitude cannot co-exist.
What stresses you out the most?
Multiple projects with deadlines far away. I’m someone who leaves things to the last minute. So I do nothing for ages when I should be making a start straight away. As the time gets closer I get increasingly stressed.
Do you have a favourite chill-out ritual that takes under 10 minutes?
I’ll do a full body shake out – if you’ve never stood in one spot and shook your body for 10 minutes, do it – it will change your life. Or I’ll get on the ground on all fours and do some nonlinear movement. Both of these help me chill out because it gets me back in the body, and when you’re present in the body you’re not in the mind worried about the future.
One of the GREAT things about getting a little older is being able to get to know yourself a little better. Is there a thing you refuse to apologise for anymore?
Choosing to cancel plans if I’d rather stay home, and saying no to things that don’t value my time, energy or skillset. Oh, and ending it with men that are showing up half-assed to try and date me!
Do you have any cold therapy hacks/ loves that you use (from ice water to cryo tools)?
Cryo is amazing! I use holding ice in each hand to stay present in the body and down regulate.
Is there a thing that everyone else THINKS calms you… but absolutely doesn’t for you?
Reading. This used to be one of my favorite pastimes for relaxation but after changing my career to be a sexologist, I’ve only read sex or body books for the last 10 years and now when I try to read a novel, my mind can’t focus – I keep thinking I should be reading something I would learn from.
What’s your go-to happy place?
Any beach. A really special ngahere (forest) that my friend takes me to when she knows I need to ground back in with nature. We hug trees and put our feet in the creek. The air is magical there!
If you have 10 minutes to yourself to focus on self-care, or do something nice for yourself, what do you do?
I will lie in the sun (usually nude) and do a guided heart meditation to bring me back to my softness and love. Before I had a puppy I would have never said this because I would have wanted 30 mins, but now if I can get a 10 min sensual self-pleasure session in, I’m happy!
This story has been brought to you by Shark Beauty – check out their new CryoGlow Cooling + LED Facial Mask here– and our story explainer on it here! If we do say so ourselves, it’s a nifty little way to devote some TLC to your skin, and have a little self-care, chill-out time in the process.