The Confidence Collection is back! There’s not a single person on the planet who hasn’t suffered a crisis of confidence at one point or another (TRUST us!). SO, we present The Confidence Collection, (click here for our previous editions!) brought to you by our pals at Caci. We’ll be covering all areas of self-belief in all areas of life – dating, work, relationships, beauty and personal growth – with practical advice, words of wisdom from women who have seen it, lived it and conquered it, and everything in between. This edition? How to get a confidence boost instantly!
We all have days where the magic is just not happening – we feel bleh, we feel unmotivated, we feel unconfident (luteal phase, anyone?). I’m no different – sometimes it feels like, to use my mother’s favourite saying, pushing shit uphill to feel any iota of joy or confidence or jazziness. But life doesn’t stop coming at you and if you need a confidence injection quick smart, then haere mai to this list that I’ve personally tried out over the last few months when I needed a pick-me-up stat. Is it slightly unhinged? Yes. Does it work? Hell yes! In this edition, I’ve popped together your ultimate confidence toolkit!
1. Adjust your posture: Seriously. I know it sounds like we’re your nana yapping at you to sit up straight but pulling your shoulders back, lifting your chin and taking up space does WONDERS for an instant confidence boost. It makes you look more powerful, it makes you feel more powerful and it’s the perfect way to start your confidence quest. Hell, whether it’s a ‘fake it ‘till you make it’ move or not, it works!
2. Go and get your brows done: It’s a tiny thing that sure, no one might notice, but a perfectly groomed brow frames your face like nothing else, and taking pride and joy in the thing that everyone sees first – your face – means that you can be confident as hell taking on the world. Go to a Caci clinic and put your mug in front of an expert who’ll wax and pluck to perfection. I always feel like a million bucks after this!
3. Turn your hallway into a runway: Lol stay with me queens but there is something about tapping into your inner child that really helps the present-day confidence, When I need a little boost I’ll mince down my hallway like I’m one of those models who strutted into America’s Next Top Model auditions with nothing but delusion and stripper heels. It puts a smile on my face, takes me away from the seriousness of whatever I’m doing and pumps me up. On that note…
4. Play my personal hype song: Just like a professional boxer strolling into a ring (I mean isn’t life a bloody fight every day!?) I always have a song to play before I head into any big meeting or social situation when I’m not feeling 100% confident. Everyone will have a different one, but it needs to be that hypes you up, makes you feel fantastic and puts a smile on your face. Mine right now is Pink Pony Club by Chappell Roan and oooosh, she’s a bloody bop that never fails to get me where I need to be (sometimes it works too well and I end up being my *confident self* at late night karaoke but hey, life is also for living kids).
5. Wear a matching underwear set: Yup, just like in the movies because I know full well that none of us gals go to the bother of wearing our nice lacy numbers every day, instead reserving them for days when we’re hoping for a bit of adult fun times. But why!? We are we wearing these (expensive) pretty pieces for other people and not for ourselves? Wearing a nice matching set makes me feel put together from the ground (or body) up, and they’re a great foundation for feeling like you’re *that girl*.
6. Do something you’re good at: As a type-A gal I’m not very good at doing things that I know I’m not good at and hey look, it’s a character flaw we’ll address later because God, one thing at a time! But when I was researching this list, almost every expert recommended doing something you know you’ll nail because it reinforces and reminds you of the strong, confident and capable woman you are. It can be a tiny thing like putting your hair in the perfect ponytail, balancing your accounts in Xero if you’re a numbers gal (how I envy you, I live in perpetual fear of the IRD) or cooking the meal you know like the back of your hand.
7. Get some self-care time in with a facial: When you’re calm and happy, it’s a hell of a lot easier to feel confident. You know that we harp on about self-care at Capsule but it’s because it’s SUCH a game changer for your life, and it’s not something that should feel indulgent or hedonistic. Investing in yourself is a sure-fire way to give yourself a confidence injection – I like to do it with a Caci Signature Peel because one, those things work like nobody’s business and two, I get to lie down for half an hour or so and collect my thoughts before I attack the rest of the day.
8. Surround yourself with affirmations: If you’re a quote and affirmation gal, this one is for you! Change your phone background to your favourite confidence-boosting affirmation or saying, so you’ll see it and read it every time you open your phone. Repetition is key for a message to sink in, and eventually you’ll be believing it in no time. I also saw someone online who organises her phone apps into affirmations – ‘I am connected’ for social media apps, ‘I am productive’ for work apps and ‘I am healthy’ for, you guessed it, health apps’, which also reinforces your capability and successes. Some confidence boosting affirmations include:
– The hardest challenges are the biggest opportunities for growth
– I can deal with whatever life throws at me
– I can be as confident as anyone else
– My past mistakes and failures won’t define my future
– My faith in myself is unshakable
– I’m braver than I give myself credit for.
9. Unplug and stop comparing: Man whoever said ‘comparison is the thief of joy’ was NOT wrong (oh turns out its Theodore Roosevelt, who knew). There’s nothing that makes me feel ‘less than’ than looking at someone else’s Instagram profile and feeling inferior. We all do it – whoever doesn’t is lying – and it’s a natural thing for humans to do. But, in saying that, it’s not a healthy way to live. So how do you stop it? Well first, of course, stop looking at the problem area, social media, even for half an hour! From there it’s easier to get a little more perspective to focus on healthy things like practicing gratitude (something I’m huge on) and, in the immortal words of Bluey’s mum Chilli, running your own race. (No I don’t have kids and yes I love Bluey and you best believe I’ve written a story about it).
10. Be bold and do the big change you’ve been wanting to do: Ok so this one is a little riskier than the others but no risk, no reward? I wrote recently in this Confidence Collection series that I’ve had something of a reinvention, especially after cutting my hair. I’ve had long, long hair for as long as I can remember and a lot of my self-worth was tied up (lol, pun not intended) in it, more than I realised. But as I’ve gotten older it’s thinned out, the texture isn’t quite what it used to be and I found myself fanaticising about what I might look like with a bob. I took the plunge and oh my God, I can’t believe how much more I feel like me with this short new hair that genuinely makes me feel like a queen. Lesson learnt: if your gut is telling you to make a big change, trust it – because confidence and intuition go hand in hand.
 list that I’ve personally tried out and use when I needed a pick-me!){kind=link}