What on earth is ‘For the Plot’ Dating? Writer Megan Watts unpacks the biggest new trend in dating amongst the Gen Z crowd.
You’ve heard of speed dating. You’ve dabbled in blind dating. But have you heard of the biggest trend in Gen Z courting?
“For the plot” dating is a new way twenty-somethings are keeping their social lives spicy, but the endgame isn’t love, or sex. It’s for a bloody good story.
Giving your number to the Starbucks guy? Going home with your best friend’s brother? Attending a metal rave on a Tuesday with the guy who delivers your mail? All “for the plot” dating.
But when love, sex and other profanities become a side hustle and we instead turn our focus to manifesting a good story to share on girls night, we may be harming ourselves with every story we accumulate.
As a girl whose “for the plot” decisions have bitten her in the bum a few times, here’s why we should ditch tale-telling and settle in for romance.
It seems in 2024, playing it safe is no longer the default option. If ever I’m on the fence, whether it be getting bangs or moving countries, the advice I receive more often than not is: do it for the plot.
If you’re a boomer, a social media castaway or are simply repulsed by pop culture trends, you may be asking yourself: what is the plot? Whose plot is it? Is the plot a land development scheme or a novel story arc? The answer is no, no and no.
Doing something for the plot basically sees one make decisions with the sole task of making their life story or “plot” a little bit more interesting. Doing something for the plot sees people insert themselves into the main character’s perspective of their own lives and, as if it were a movie, make decisions that make for an exciting day in the cinemas.
Doing things for the plot has largely been an inspiring movement. People taking chances, making moves and living as if they were in a cheesy teen flick has seen “the plot” of everyday life gain a little bit more colour.
Go to bed? Or sneak out to go swimming with the boy next door? Do it for the plot.
But now, Gen Z is introducing the trend into their dating lives and it’s an interesting lens to look at romance through.
Scared to go on a date? Make the first move? Kiss the girl? “Do it for the plot” are five words that can catapult you into your big girl boots and push you into doing the damn thing. But what happens when we abandon logic for the plot and end up with a storyline that doesn’t quite live up to the movie we picture?
Take my dating life for example – always a site for clumsy love lessons.
I was six months out of a breakup, proudly celibate and in that perfect in-between phase of hermitting and healing when trouble entered the DMs.
Trouble had long been lingering on the outskirts, waiting to fuck and fuck up the tranquility of my “zero boy tolerance” zone, one filled with reformer pilates, tarot card readings and daily affirmations. But one night, after forgetting the ever-peaceful state of my sexless existence, I decided to open the door a peep. Out of boredom, out of curiosity, but mostly, “for the plot”.
In hindsight, when making decisions we know are bad, three little words can make it seem frivolous, unserious and certifiably Carrie Bradshaw. But I knew then and I know now: it was a dumb bitch move.
A bruised ego, an STI scare (just a scare, but still) and a big fat misogynist confession later, my tranquil healing phase had turned into smoking cigarettes in the bathtub while listening to Joni Mitchell. Oh how the mighty had fallen. Oh how the healed had begun to unravel.
“For the plot” had certainly provided a myriad of stories to share at girls night, therapy and McDonalds after too many tequilas became a meltdown over a Big Mac at 2am. But as a person who tells stories for a living, I was beginning to not like the ones I was creating.
Dating, fucking, loving, dumping and ghosting for the plot? It’s an easy scape goat move when playing the game of hearts. But it doesn’t quite cut the bullshit- it’s an easy way to shirk away from real, meaningful decisions and actions.
Are we creating love stories for stories’ sake? Are we forcing characters into our plot that belong to another tale? And most importantly, are we staying true to our protagonists aka ourselves?
At the end of the day, the only person who’s going to read your book from start to finish is you. The plot is not only the story you create, it’s the story you’ve got to live with for the rest of your life. So make it authentically you and not the result of a cringe Gen Z trend that saw me cut bangs.
