Emma Cains is one of 12 ‘adult virgins’ who went on a new and controversial UK reality tv show Virgin Island. On a luxury Mediterranean retreat, the group got a crash course on intimacy from a very “hands-on” team of sexologists. In a video interview with Capsule’s Vivien, Emma opens up about virginity, self-pleasure and confidence.
Virgin Island is a unique and controversial new reality tv show coming out from the UK.
Twelve ‘adult virgins’ (as the show called it) between the ages of 22 to 30 went on Virgin Island to find a way to overcome their struggles with intimacy – with some fearing just being touched.
On the island, a team of sexologists ran a very “hands-on” course on intimacy, connection, consent and well… sex.
Partner surrogacy therapy is a form of sex therapy used on the show, which involves three people: the ‘client’ (the participants in this case), a licensed sex therapist or clinical psychologist and surrogate partner.
Surrogate partners are trained professionals who engage with specific activities with the participant, such as touch, consent and emotional connection. It could be things like flirting, how to communicate and yes – sex.
The show has gotten critique for its approach, and critics have argued that the show is exploitative to an already vulnerable group of young people.
But other reviews (like The Guardian) have said that it’s more complex than that. If you get past the first episode (and maybe hit mute on all the moaning) – it’s surprisingly empathetic.
You start to see how honest, vulnerable and courageous these young adults are for exploring how the stigma around being an adult virgin has impacted their sense of self.
You follow them on a journey of self-discovery, embracing (and discovering) their sexuality and overcoming what’s blocking them from making romantic or intimate connections.
For then 23-year-old Emma Cains, who described herself as the DUFF “Designated Ugly Fat Friend”, she was so terrified at just the thought of intimacy and she wanted to overcome that.
Now 25, Emma says she’s a whole new person. She’s in her women empowerment era, and that she’s got that show to thank for that.
In the video interview, she talks about how much confidence she’s gained since Virgin Island, how her perceptions of virginity have changed and (spoilers!) what she’s learnt about self-pleasure since experiencing her first orgasm on the retreat.
Virgin Island is now streaming on TVNZ+.
Banner Photo: Vivien Beduya
