Sunday, April 14, 2024

I’ll Have What She’s Having: Our Panel Reviews the Satisfyer Vibes Yummy Sunshine Vibrator

Welcome to the first instalment of I’ll Have What She’s Having, our monthly panel of real, honest sex toy reviews, in conjunction with our friends at Adulttoymegastore!

This month, we’re reviewing Satisfyer Vibes Yummy Sunshine – and this one has the panel divided (and scroll down for our exclusive discount code if you’re thinking this sounds like a bit of you!) For all of our panel’s sex toy reviews, click here.

Cecilia, 43 – Sex toy virgin and mum of two who’s keen to expand her horizons

“It’ll get you where you need to go… if anything, it’s a little too effective!”

How big should a vibrator be? That’s a question I’ve never asked myself before but am now contemplating in my new role of ‘first-time user of sex toys writing anonymous review’. Because a quick Google of Satisfyer Vibes Yummy Sunshine leads to complaints that the girth of this toy is too much for some. I, however, would put this in the ‘exact right girth’ category. Not so large as to need a tube of lube, not so small as to disappear. Disclaimer, I’ve had kids.

In fact, the only thing I found awkward about the experience was having the courier drop the box containing this, and other, sex toys to the wrong house during Level 4 lockdown. I can still picture my neighbour at the end of the driveway, carefully placing this parcel on the ground and backing away like it was a sacred offering. Thank goodness for plain packaging or we’d never be able to make eye contact again.

Getting to the point of the review: this toy will get you where you need to go. The looped handle is excellent for positioning it right where needed, and controlling the pressure so you’re not gone in 60 seconds. There are multiple vibration options but they essentially all amount to an intense ride. If anything, it’s a little too effective, so being able to adjust so easily helps. Added bonus for me (Level 4 lockdown with kids remember) is that it’s quiet. Five stars.

Satisfyer Yummy Sunshine with 12 vibration program
The Satisfyer Yummy Sunshine. Ray of sunshine or banana battering ram?

Amanda, 50 – Single menopausal empty nester with enough power tools and sex toys to keep herself sane and occupied

“I don’t like vaginal morse code, so I like that I have options”

Satisfyer Vibes Yummy Sunshine is unabashedly yellow and cheery.  It’s quite refreshing to not have a vibrator attempt to be a gross shade of pink, but this definitely reminds me of a banana in more ways than one.  It’s charged with the magnetic charging pin that is a feature of Satisfyer toys, and probably their only drawback.  Something that round doesn’t naturally want to stay still so I had to stabilise it to get the pin to stick to it.  

It’s a decent size at around 12cm girth and length to insert, and surprisingly lightweight.  The Satisfyer standard two setting change buttons make it easy to cycle through the six constant speeds and six vibration patterns, although they feel like they’re the wrong way around if you’re using this yourself.  

The ring handle was easy to hold and gave me the option of using it more like a dildo, as it’s flexible and has G-spot ribbing.  I don’t always feel like vaginal morse code in my nether regions so I like having options.  I also tried it as a clitoral vibrator, which worked best lying face down with a little grinding with a low vibe setting.  I’m not sure Yummy Sunshine is going to enter the regular rotation, but I’ll definitely give it another go to mix things up.

Katy, 29 – Polyamorous bisexual with two girlfriends, a cat and enough sex toys sink a small boat

“It’s like I’m fucking a weird-shaped banana… but my eyes rolled back in my head”

I think we can all agree that ‘sunshine’ isn’t the first thing that comes to mind when you see this toy. I think the colour is gorgeous, but sometimes I can’t help but feel like I’m fucking a weird-shaped banana. Gotta get your 5+ a day though right?

Fruity jokes aside, I feel like the unique shape of the Satisfyer Vibes Yummy Sunshine means that it’s going to be more effective for some people than others. I struggled to find a satisfying position when I used it by myself because the section that juts out near the base prevented me from properly hitting my g-spot.

I wasn’t feeling overly enthused about this toy after my first time trying it, however my partner used it on me and managed to find some magical technique that had my eyes rolling back in my head. I think the trick is not to go for your standard thrust motion, but more of a deep pulse.

I’d say the main thing I really like about this toy is the vibration settings. I find that the lowest setting for most standard vibes is actually quite intense, so I really like the lower intensity levels that this toy has. 

Sarah, 31 – Single and curious professional who would like to not just rely on her trusty Satisfyer Pro 2 for a good time

“Girthy? Sure. Too big? Nah, not with some lube and can-do attitude”

I have this thing where I have an irrational hatred of pink sex toys. Not all women like pink, for fuck’s sake. So I was pleasantly surprised to see the bright yellow Satisfyer Vibes Yummy Sunshine tumble out of the box.

Yes, there’s a passing resemblance to a banana, but my first thought was just one of happiness. How can you NOT already be propelled into a good mood when you see that bright yellow shaft of joy?

And I’ll tell you, the joy continued after this bad boy was taken out of the box. Girthy? Sure. Too big? Nah, not with some trusty lube and a can-do attitude. I’m more of an outie than an innie when it comes to sex toys (hence my love affair with the Satisfyer Pro 2 which deserves ALL THE PRAISE.)

This one doesn’t have any clit-sucking action, but I was still able to use it like a big bullet, and sweet Jesus, it’s a vibe (pun intended). I worked my up through the 12 settings until I made Meg Ryan’s diner performance look like a shonky community theatre production – it’s that good. And as for the innie action – it’s good. It’s waterproof, and the ridge towards the bottom cradles the vulva nicely as the rest of the sunshine does its business. 

The handle is actually a masterstroke of toy design – you don’t have to focus on keeping a good grip while you’re jiggling and shimmying around, and it’s super quick to charge. Bottom line, this is a wonderful addition to the fruit salad that is my burgeoning sex toy collection, and in my opinion, the humble banana doesn’t get enough credit anyway.

Angela, 42 – mother of many humans, wife to a mighty fine guy, finally getting on the self-pleasure band wagon

‘It’s like a battering ram’

You know the saying, bigger is better? Well, frankly I must disagree. Satisfyer Vibes Yummy Sunshine was almost a little too intimidating in terms of size. It’s REALLY Big. And straight (despite claims in the blurb that it has a curve, I’m not so sure that the curve exits, or if it did it wasn’t curving in the direction I needed it to).

And it’s a bit like a battering ram. From my investigations I could see that the motor on this bad boy is pretty powerful and there’s plenty of setting options, which means there’s plenty of variety, but I just found the whole thing a bit too…..much. In my quest to find things that you can use very quickly in the small windows of opportunity that exist when your house is full of people, this just doesn’t ‘fit’ the bill. He seemed to be too time-consuming and a bit too much effort.

Now, I’m not saying that I don’t think he’ll do the trick, not at all, it’s just that it’s the kind of toy that takes a lot of time to build up to, and I simply did not get a chance to really invest. I must be honest and say the yellow sunshine is the toy most likely to end up hiding in my bedside table and not being utilised when compared to my other options (look forward to those reviews next month!)

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