She’s the gal’s gal of Irish comedy, known for her wildly self-deprecating comedy shows that poke fun at herself as much as they do the ridiculousness of the world and someone you really do want to sit down with with a glass of wine for an in-depth goss about everything and anything.
In her new comedy show Pinotphile, which she’s bringing to New Zealand in May, Joanne McNally, who you might know from Taskmaster and who also co-hosts podcast My Therapist Ghosted Me (true story) chats men, dating, singledom in her 40s and her own existential crisis (who’s not having one right now) and before she touches down in Aotearoa, she chatted to Capsule’s Kelly Meharg about becoming the ‘elder millennial’, her love of women and how she truly gave less fucks after turning 40.
C: Hello, Joanne! How are ya!
J: I’m grand – I’m in bed though, please don’t judge me.
C: I would never, to be perfectly honest I stumbled out of bed 20 minutes ago and still have pyjama bottoms on so I’m with you.
J: Aren’t we just living the dream!
C: Mate, are we what. Firstly, we’re so looking forward to having you back in New Zealand again! This’ll be your second time after you brought The Prosecco Express here, and now your show is Pinotphile. I mean, I’m sensing a theme, and I’m assuming you’re onto a winner?
J: Well, until they cart me off to rehab [laughs]. I think I’ll call the next one Sauvignon Slut. I jest, but it really does sum up the energy of the shows, and that’s not to suggest the shows are feral warzones of women tripping out on wine, but I do like to create a little party vibe.
And I’ve spoken at length about the role that wine plays in me and my friends’ lives, the joining of the wine glasses and the social lubricant and the gossip that goes around it. It probably sounds a little reductive, obviously there’s more to our lives than that, but I’m putting on a night out.
C: I love so much that so much of your comedy is so unashamedly women-centric, and really does celebrate the sisterhood as much as it pokes fun at it. It must be so cool to be able to facilitate getting women together for a bloody good night out, away from kids and life and all the rest of it.
J: Yeah, and we’re all very tribal, aren’t we. I’m a woman with no husband and no kids, and as I’m getting older I’m becoming more reliant on my female friends. Well, them and my male friends who are predominantly gay. They’re my tribe and my community.
Also, I’ve started to recognise my role as the millennial elder at the age of 42. I’m an elder member of the female tribe and that’s kind of the essence of the show. I’m very lucky, I get a lot of women in their 20s coming to the shows and I think that’s probably because I’m not married, I’m single. I think that culture is shifting in the sense there are more unmarried women with no kids than ever before. And when you’re younger, you’re thinking ‘I’m never going to meet anyone’ because when you’re 20, you think you’re 68. So, maybe I’m offering a blueprint option that shows hey, it’s actually not a bad life!
C: Are you that ‘elder millennial’ in your real life then, too? Have you found yourself as the advice giver?
J: Well we do a podcast, me and my friend Vogue [Williams] called My Therapist Ghosted Me – he actually did ghost me – where we keep things quite light and pop culture for most of it, but then we answer emails from listeners and I actually really enjoy that part – we take it quite seriously, although you probably wouldn’t know that from the answers.
C: It’s such a lovely thing, because girlhood and womenhood is so amazing, but a lot of us don’t have that built-in group of female friends, as much as we’d love to and have someone to talk to on-tap.
J: I’m always trying to seek out mentors. I’m flat-out DMing women I’ve never met before, asking them to be my mentor and them flat out telling me, what? [Laughs]. I’m a big believer in the sisterhood. I read somewhere… no, that’s a lie, it was on TikTok, that women’s communication centres in the brain are 30% bigger than men’s. I mean I don’t fact check anything, but the way we come together is to share a wine and share stories and it’s so easy to dismiss it as gossip, but I think it’s hardcore important data.
I also think it’s important for women to have friends of different ages. I have friends in their 60s and 70s, and some in their 20s. There’s no limit to the amount of women I want in my life. Society is shifting and I think women are becoming more reliant on each other. And hopefully, your best female friend won’t turn around and shag your cousin.
C: I mean, one would hope! My friends and I often joke about upping sticks and starting a commune because the whole idea of ‘it takes a village’ just doesn’t really exist anymore.
J: Oh the commune movement is huge! I live on my own and I’m independent and fairly resilient but I’m also aware that no woman is an island, especially as you get a bit older.
Joanne pauses the chat for a minute as she gets out of bed to answer the door – it’s her food delivery man, whom she introduces to us before cheerily bidding him goodbye, plonking her takeaways on the kitchen bench and pouring herself a glass of pinot gris. We fall in love with her a little more.
J: Sorry, anyway. I was one of those women who would, embarrassingly, fall madly in love with a man and completely lose my mind and cut off all my friends and crawl into him and live my life through his eyes. I’ve completely changed now. I think I’m part of that movement and I’m decentering men.
C: We’ve talked about that a lot!
J: Right, are they worth the hassle? I mean I’m not saying no, it’s lovely to be in love and I’ve been in love several times and I fall in love quite easy – which I think is a skill set – but I’ve realised it’s not the be all and end all. The whole idea of marriage has changed and monogamy is not having a great moment. Whoever’s doing the PR for monogamy is doing a terrible job.
C: Are your shows always very reflective of what’s going on in your own life?
J: Yeah, with Prosecco Express the theme was that I felt like I was drinking prosecco at other people’s milestones – that was the vibe. I was doing that show for years and I always thought that by the time I finished Prosecco, I’d have all this fresh content when writing my new show. I’ll be married! I’ll have three kids! I’ll have this really hot husband and we’ll have an orchard and I’ll be making chutneys. But nothing has changed. I’m still single, with a couple of very toxic relationships in the meantime. So I was kind of freaked when I had to go and write Pinotphile. But this show is a little more honest, and I feel as though I’ve matured a lot as a performer and as a woman.
C: Did you get that jolt when you turned 40 where you really did give less fucks than your 30s?
J: There’s certain things that happen when you turn 40, like your forehead turning into a 12-head – there’s a lot of physical things that happen. But, there’s a certain higher level of ugliness I’m willing to be seen at on the streets of London that I wouldn’t have dared to be seen at before. I thought that was character development but in the same breath, I’ve had enough Botox and fish sperm to sink an aquarium. I think, you know what, traditionally, women are scared of growing old, especially turning 40. You’re put out to pasture with a vagina as dry as a cactus. Society doesn’t see you anymore, you’re invisible.
But in my experience, it’s when I hit my stride. I’ve never been more confident, more content and less caught up in the bullshit. I feel like I’m kind of only getting going. Women wiser than me have always said that the 20s and 30s were for learning and the 40s are about enjoying the fruits of your labour and settling into your skin. I feel very strongly about that. I especially have a big sense of arrested development, I only really hit my stride at 35, 36.
C: Give me the pitch for Pinotphile then – what can we expect from you and the show?
J: As an Irish person I’m completely allergic to self-promotion – I’m like, don’t come, the show’s a piece of shit! [Laughs]. But it’s a fun night out with your girlfriends. I get very few couples. It’s mostly female friends, gay men and a couple of straights sprinkled around against their will. If you want to laugh your tits off and have a few proseccos, then you’ll love it!
See Joanne McNally with her new show Pinotphile on 15 April at James Hay Theatre, Christchurch, 16 April at The Opera House, Wellington and 17 April at Kiri Te Kanawa Theatre, Auckland. Book now
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