Putting together Capsule’s first-ever Good B*tch Awards has confirmed for us that there’s one sentence that all the women you know need to hear, ASAP.
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When we started brainstorming the concept for what would eventually become our first-ever Good B*itch Awards, Capsule did something of a word salad as to what we wanted the awards to FEEL like.
“You know when you’re telling one woman about another woman, and you’re trying to sum up the fact that she’s capable, trustworthy, a good hang and just a great all-round human, so you say… ‘she’s a good bitch.’ Can we call it… that?” said one of us – and that was it.
Obviously there was the anxiety spiral that people would think we were anti-feminist for using the word ‘bitch’ but luckily, that has mostly turned out to be an unfounded fear. But as we got into the process and started letting people know they were nominated, there was one surprising thread that came with all of the responses: these women were thrilled to be told that someone had noticed their hard work, and that they were doing a good job.
“I really needed to hear this,” was the refrain we heard, over and over again. These women are business leaders, CEOs, Queen’s Honours recipients, household names. And yet, they are just like any of us in that they want to know they’re making a difference. This confirmed something we have long since believed at Capsule: 1) everyone is having a hard time, no matter how perfect things look on the outside and 2) everyone you know – and particularly every woman you know – needs to be told that they’re doing a good job.
You can chalk this up to many things – the work ethic that has been drilled into us over the years, the gold-star of measuring success we have come to value along the way – but really, the most important factor is that life is hard, and leading in any way is often tiring, lonely and really, really relentless. Leading a business is hard. Leading a family is hard. Leading a relationship, leading a friendship. Showing up, again and again, and doing your best.
We can all channel our inner good b*tch and start telling the people in our lives that they’re doing a good job, no matter the circumstances. Your local barista made you one of those perfect flat whites with the little pattern on top? Tell them! You went out for a meal and the food was delicious? Make a note to let the chef know. Got a colleague that always does an annoying task really well? Send them a thank you email. Tell your friendship circle how much you value them, share the love whenever you can.
Oprah Winfrey once said that no matter who she interviewed, they would end the interview by saying, ‘how was that, was that okay?’ From heads of state, through to celebrities, through to prisoners, through to charity workers – they would all say it. “What I learned is that people were really saying was, ‘did you hear me? Did you see me? And did what I say mean anything to you?’” she said. It taught her that no matter who a person was, they needed validation that way they were doing mattered – and that someone had noticed.
Obviously, Capsule’s Good B*tch awards exist on a slightly smaller scale than Oprah’s work – so far, am I right ladies??? – but it was a good reminder to take the time to tell people that you notice their effort, and that you value it. We can all be the Good B*tch we want to see in the world by saying the five words every woman you know needs to hear: You’re doing a good job.
Voting for the people’s choice award in Capsule’s first-ever Good B*tch Awards is now open, click here for more information
