Whether you’re in a new relationship or are seasoned professionals who have been married for years (or if lockdown has led to, er, some tense moments in your household) one of the most important keys to happiness is communication. And if there’s anything 2020 has taught us, is that communication is key, team.
To encourage New Zealanders to try something new, sexual wellness brand Lovehoney’s in-house ‘sexpert’ Sammi Cole has put together her five top tips for getting that spark back – and it’s definitely not all to do with the bedroom! (But some of it totes is)
1. Schedule date night
Clear your schedule and make time for a date night, away from any distractions like phones, social media and tv shows. Don’t fret about what activity to do, it can be something as simple as cooking your favourite meal or spending the day at the beach. Life can sometimes seem like it’s going at full speed, so the purpose of dedicated time out is to slow down and spend quality, uninterrupted time together.
2. Get outside
There’s nothing better than getting outdoors and soaking up some vitamin C. New Zealand is full of beautiful scenic National Parks, coastal walks and hiking trails, so there’s plenty of places to go with your partner to get some fresh air in your lungs and reconnect. Use the time exploring to talk and listen to each other. The calming environment and release of happy hormones will do wonders for you both.
3. Learn your partner’s love language
If you haven’t done this already, you’re missing out on a valuable tool to help understand yourself and your partner. With a little help from The 5 Love Languages® quiz, you can learn to identify the root of conflicts, give and receive love in more meaningful ways and grow closer. Once you’ve both taken the quiz, your Love Language profile will explain your primary love language, what it means and how you and your partner can use it to connect.
4. Reconnect physically
Dedicate some time to reconnecting physically. Sex toys and sexual aids can be great tools to help lead to new experiences and sensations and even help get us back to the basics of touch and intimacy. Something like a sexy massage may be the perfect way to begin to reconnect with your partner’s body using massage candles and oils, and exploring their body through touch. There is a sensuality and intimacy in stroking and caressing the arms, legs, back and chest of your partner. If you can’t physically be with your partner, try an app controlled toy to control your partner’s pleasure from anywhere in the world via your phone.
5. Spice things up
Take things up a notch and put the fun back into playtime with a bedroom game. Some nights you might just want a cuddle and some nights you might want something a little more vigorous. Lovehoney’s Oh! Sexploration Vouchers is a pack of 52 peel-back cards divided between ‘Romantic’ and ‘Raunchy’ actions, allowing you and your partner to mix up sweet or sexy surprises.
