Welcome to TBH – To Be Honest – Capsule’s monthly column with our columnist and old pal, Brodie Kane! This month, Brodie is f***ing OVER the hype that comes along with Christmas and has decided to do her own thing on the big day.
And for her previous columns, click here!
Well, another year has come and is almost gone and I have no doubt many reading this will be completely running on fumes. The more we ask one another “how are you?” in the weeks leading up to Christmas, the more we respond through gritted teeth with a silly little laugh and a “yeah good”, when in actual fact we’re completely done with the year and are CRAWLING to the finish line.
And yet every year, as we cough and splutter on said fumes, business ramps up. There’s a sudden urgency of last-minute work assignments that suddenly need to get signed off or squared away before the Christmas break. I must admit I have indeed responded to a couple of these types of requests with “how about we get back in touch in the new year” because the stamina or will just simply isn’t there.
Not only is the mahi manic, there’s this weird thing that happens every year where almost overnight everyone is in their cars at ALL times – on every road and in every carpark known to mankind. There’s absolutely no nipping out to the shops or to run errands in the build-up to Christmas. Nipping out does not exist at this time. I will admit I have twice in the past two days turned around and driven right back home. I do not have the stamina or will to be in the thick of it.
Then there’s the social gatherings. These really pop off don’t they? All of a sudden there’s all these things on school nights and I can hand on heart say I have not been to a single social gathering in the month of December. I haven’t even had the Brodie Kane Media Christmas Party (for one lol) and I’ve decided that actually, it can bloody wait until January. Who says we have to cram in all these dos before Christmas when all we want to do is have an early night and watch The Holiday/Love Actually/Home Alone etc (PSA: The Hannah Waddingham Christmas Special on Apple is a MUST this year).
Oh yeah, have we got our summer bods ready? The answer is f*ck off, we don’t play that dumb game anymore, thanks.
And then there’s Christmas itself, which combines all the above pressures, squeezed tightly into a small bauble, with a side of financial stress which was well and truly already steaming but hey let’s add this additional day to really tighten our sphincter one last time this year.
Fa la la la la.
This massive, chaotic build-up is for one day of the year. ONE. DAY. OF. THE. YEAR.
There are many people out there who absolutely love Christmas, there will also be many people out there who dread Christmas, there will also be people potentially like me who just don’t have the stamina or will for Christmas this year. So, why does the Christmas rulebook have to be the same for everyone? Short answer: it doesn’t.
Now look, you may well be thinking at this point what a Grinch I am (because lord knows we love to call people that who don’t possess the Christmas vibes). But do you know what? I’m fine with that name this year. But also, I’m a single, 37-year old woman with no children. I have decided that this year, I’m spending the day with some very dear friends. If you need a name for it, let’s call it Friendmas. In my mind, I’m packing a beautiful fresh ham sandwich, my togs and towel and I’m going to the beach.
Am I protesting against Christmas by wanting to break the Christmas rulebook? No.
Am I a bad daughter for not spending Christmas Day with my parents? No.
Am I a bad sister/aunty/niece for not spending Christmas Day with them? No.
Am I a bad person for wanting to do my own thing this year? No.
Will the OG Christmas rulebook still make me feel a bit guilty that I’m trying to write a new rulebook? Probably, but I’ll work on that.
Look, I guess what I’m trying to say here is, my gosh we put SO much pressure on ourselves and those around us at this time of year. It’s a time when people are tired, stressed and in need of a break. So, with that, let’s keep re-writing the Christmas rulebook so it caters for everyone. Because let me tell you, what you decide to do on that ONE. DAY. OF. THE. YEAR doesn’t define you. You are not a grinch if you don’t have it in you.
It is one day.
